Tuesday, October 7, 2008

THE COOLEST (DRINKING) GAME ON EARTH


Since the NHL has been dubbed the ‘Coolest Game on Earth’ my buddies and I, who are hockey nuts, decided that it needed the honor of a drinking game. After we started we realized we needed to jot down the rules sometime when we were sober. Well now they're here for your drinking pleasure. And think, only two games late!

Materials needed:

Boobs are not a required material but they go well with a shot glass


1. One shot glass per person
2. Two Quarters per person
3. A whole bunch of pennies (preferably 20+)
4. Beer per Person in Cup (no bottles or cans)
5. Choice liquor (whatever floats your boat)
6. Game Face (that’s right … bring it bitch!)

Another excuse to view a girl without a shirt


Rules:

1. KEY PLAYERS SELECTION
-Drinkers must all decide on 3-4 Players from the hockey game to be a part of their drinking game. Preferable if chosen from the 3rd and 4th lines. These will be your Key Players.

2. KEY PLAYER SCRAMBLE
-The scramble goes like this. The play-by-play announcer calls the names of the players on the ice. If he announces a Key Player’s name (it doesn’t matter if it’s during play or not), all of the drinkers must try to bounce a quarter into their shot glass. Last person to do so receives a penny. In the event that Key Player’s are called back to back you must get two quarters in. It will be run like there are two quick rounds. If there are 4 drinkers and 3 get quarters in, the 4th drinker gets a penny and can start on ‘round 2’ of the back to back Key Player names immediately. Whoever loses that next round will take the next penny.

3. FIVE PENNY SLAM
-Once a Drinker accumulates 5 pennies he must immediately take a shot. They can then return their pennies to the middle of the table (or wherever you’re keeping them).







If you're keeping score at home you owe 10 seconds


4. GOAL!!!!!
-Drink 10 seconds every time a goal is scored!

5. PENALTY
-Drink 5 seconds for every Penalty.

6. ICING
-No fat-ass! Get off my Betty Crocker! This is Hockey Icing! Drink 5 seconds every time the puck is iced.






If you're a man you'll drink more for a victory


7. FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!!!!!!
-If there is a Manly display of power you will reward that display by doing something else manly. Drink the entire time the players are scrapping! You may stop if your beer is finished. But go get another one! You are rewarded for your own display of Man Power by not having to drink 5 seconds for the penalty.






8. BLOOD SPORT
-Anytime you see blood be manly and drink 5 seconds.

Can you say Luck?

9. CLANG!!! SCRAMBLE!!!
-If the puck is rung off the pipes every one must bounce their quarter into their shot glass. Last one to make it has to take an immediate shot.

10. SPEED RULE
-The Hockey game will not stop for you just because you’re a little bitch who is getting owned in quarters or if your beer has run out. If a Key Players name is called or a post is hit with a puck while you are getting your shot you must drink it as fast as you can before you can play that quarters round. If everyone gets their quarter in before you return you receive another penny. If it happens while you’re refreshing your beer then hurry!






Nice to meet you Mr. Alfredsson. Big fan.

11. JACKED UP!!!
-Heavy body checks are rewarded with a 3 second drink



Pretty soon I'll have a ring you can kiss during these handshakes little bro'


12. BONUS – STAAL GAMES!!!!!
-This is an awesome time in the NHL right now because there are three Staal brothers in the league (the 4th is a good prospect). Two of them are in the same division. If you’re playing this game and two brothers are in it playing each other then two of your Key Players must be the Staal brothers. And anytime they show the parents it’s a 5 second social.

3 comments:

The Hunky said...

Bravo. I like it. I couldnt wait for the game on Saturday, now I really cant wait for it. My wife will be pleased when I crawl into bed after the game and piss the bed later in the night. She will know as she begins to take up moisture that the Pens must have won.

Irish Road said...

Runhigh was lucky enough to get tickets so we won't be able to until the following game. Hopefully you'll drink enough for all three of us. You're a Pittsburgher ... I have faith.f

Anonymous said...

Our tickets are up in Section E. Anybody at the game look for two crazy idiots who wish they earned enough money to get seats closer to the ice.